Black Friday

Black Friday was a shocker for me. I actually went to the mall with my husband and two sons. The reason for the visit was my sons wanted to clothes shop! The crowds weren't bad and we got free valet parking because my husband drives a Lexus. While in Macy's shopping for the second son, the first son came by to deliver a silent but deadly bomb. I didn't know until the second son commented and then the odor hit. We quickly decided we didn't like the clothes in that area and left. I saw the first son in a far away aisle smiling. Once we regrouped we discussed finding the husband/father. I had just finished a large diet coke and felt a burb. I gave my boys my best manly burb. I felt it was weak but they moved to another area. I followed. I started telling the first son how disgusting it was for him to unload his bomb on us. He interrupted to tell me there were no filters in my life. I did not know what to say in polite society like talking about sex changes. Which I have most certainly not been talking about recently. By now we all realize that the father/husband is still missing. The first son goes barreling off to find him. After he leaves, the second son says " If you didn't drink soft drinks you wouldn't be so gassy". Me gassy? All I did was burb. The second son said that was being gassy. The first son comes back to report no father/husband. After more trips around the men's department we headed to Nordstrom's. After all we said we were going there next. The whole way the first son argues about where the father/husband is. We arrive in the men's department at Nordstrom's to find the father/husband. He says he has been looking for us. I give both sons the look and head over to the women's shoes. We all got some good deals and came home happy and maybe closer. Who knows?