Arnold, Arnold, Arnold!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What to say? What to say? What to say? The man is a pig. We all know that. The man should be castrated. Where can I sign up? The man is going to be in deep dodo. He should be. The Democratic party in California wants his hide. If he were a Democrat the Republicans would want his hide. We all know when it comes to being a sleaze bag politicians are non-partisan. The pictures of his "woman"/housekeeper show a nice round woman. Maria is thin in that "gotta stay popular look". Are men saying they want some meat on their women? Will Arnold be back? Of course he will. Less rich and the true Arnold showing, but he will be back. As long as his pictures make money. I would suggest he has less pictures of him strutting around with cigars in his mouth. Doesn't he remember Bill Clinton and his cigars? Now I have to discuss my favorite sleazy politicians - John Edwards and Mark Sanford. Jenny was smart. She kicked her idiot to the curb. Right now the idiot is living in Argentina with "the love of his life". John is in the "forever dodo pile". Elizabeth saw to that. I was never her fan but when the baby came to light she made sure the whole world knew she had cancer,was dying, and her husband had sex and a baby. I know this because all the television coverage regarding Arnold leads to all other politician scandals. The scandals are grouped in who recovered and who didn't. John Edwards is the first mentioned as not recovered and never will.. Mission accomplished, Elizabeth. Oh yeah, Rielle the woman who bore the love child and told all John and she were soul mates, is still single living in Charlotte. She isn't living in a big mansion or on Charlotte's A-list. She isn't my BFF either which is why she isn't an " A-lister" in Charlotte. But getting back to the weight issue with women. Rielle is that bony, "throw her some fat" look and Elizabeth had the nice matronly look. The weight of the wife and other woman has no correlation to the affair.The moral of all this are men are like dogs in heat. If they are thrown an inviting scent, they will mount it.

Dog On the Head

A good night's sleep hasn't been happening for a few weeks. The number one reason is my pleurisy. Painful breathing is not compatible with sleeping. The number two reason is getting up at least once but sometimes three times to pee. That will keep you awake. But on two separate occasions "dog on the head" has woke me up. You say, "What is "dog on the head'? I say, " You wake from a sound sleep with a dog on your head". The dog in question is Zeus. He is terrified of thunderstorms. He paces and moans. Then he plasters himself to your side until the storm subsides. Unfortunately for him and me both, we have had some mean storms in the middle of the night. The first time it happened I woke up with his rear sitting on my face. A border collie/german shepherd fuzzy, fluffy rear end with lots of fur to land in your mouth. After swatting Zeus off and removing all the fur from my face and mouth, I put him back on the floor where he belonged. Two nights ago I woke up with him curled around the top of my head. His big plume of a tail fanned across my face. This time it took longer to get him to the floor. The storm was bad and he had a comfy spot. Yeah, waking up to "dog on the head" is a definite sleep buster.

Food and Drugs

Heads up to all who travel through Asheville with food in your car. A Latino man from California was traveling to Johnson City, Tennessee to visit a sister. A sister he hasn't seen in ten years. A Latino man who is a legal resident. The man missed a turn and ended up in Asheville. He pulled over his truck because he saw steam coming out. A deputy stopped. The man thought the deputy wanted him to move so he drove away with his hazard lights flashing. Thinking the man was running, the deputy punctured his tires. Now for the good part. In the truck was an unidentifiable something. The deputy tested it for illegal drugs with a portable kit. The kit changed color so off to jail the man went. The unidentifiable something was a mix of cheese,shrimp,and tortilla and tamale dough. Of course it took four days to discover it was food not drugs. The sheriff's office wrote a check for $400.00 to cover the food he lost. An enzyme in the cheese triggered a false positive making 91 pounds of tortilla dough become cocaine. So no cheese eating through Asheville. It could be dangerous especially if you are Latino.

Voltaren Gel

My sjogren's has moved into my hands with some "lupus like symptoms". This has caused swelling, pain, redness, and a poor grip. My rheumatologist gave me some samples of Voltaren gel. I got some pain relief and asked for a prescription. My son took it to the local Wal-Mart to be filled. Voltaren gel is topical meaning you apply it on your body. The instructions on the box said, " Take one tablet by mouth daily." The little warnings said, "Take This Medicine With A Full Glass Of Water, May Cause Drowsiness or Dizziness, and Take This Medicine With A Snack Or Small Meal If Stomach Upset Occurs." I am afraid stomach upset would occur no matter what if you ate the Voltaren. More than drowsiness or dizziness would occur if you ate the Voltaren. And drinking the Voltaren with a full glass of water wouldn't help either. If I had not received a sample and was a nurse, I just might be eating my Voltaren gel. I took it back to Wal-Mart and showed the pharmacist. No apologies, just grab the box and slap on a new label. So everyone out here please read your prescription labels and inserts. If it doesn't make sense take it back to the pharmacy. My hand is much better. I "rub" the gel on my hand and haven't had any stomach upset.

Father of the Bride

I feel like I pick on my neighbors to the South. These neighbors are the Rock Hill,S.C. bunch. I have no grudge against anyone there. In fact I have friends and family from the area.I am sorry but some of the craziest stuff in the paper happens in Rock Hill. A few weekends ago a rehearsal dinner hit a sore note. The father of the bride assumed the father of the groom was picking up the tab. The father of the groom did not. The father of the bride received the bill including the bar tab. Things went "South" quick. He created a disturbance in the restaurant. Then he went to his truck and got his knife. The police were called and the father of the bride was arrested. The article gave no details of the wedding. I don't know if the father of the bride got bailed out of jail for the wedding or not. Imagine how the family Christmas get-together is gonna be. "Hey, "Aunt Dottie", bring your pound cake. I 'm bringing a ham and Daddy is bringing his knife." Kinda brings a tear to my eye.

Family Pictures

There are moments in your life when you are weak and have a "Hallmark moment". Several weeks ago I realized I could have all my children home Memorial Day weekend. I expanded that to believe that we could have a family portrait. I had a picture of the kids made my daughter's senior year. The picture hangs over my mantle and gives me pleasure every day. That photographer has sent me gift coupons for $100.00 over the past two years. I immediately called the photographer and said "I need a picture." I recognized the female voice on the phone as the the person calling me monthly to use my gift card. She is standing by to meet my needs in a bright singing voice. After I explained that I wanted a family portrait Saturday of Memorial weekend, the song left her voice. Flatly she told me that they will be closed that day, all day. Even with my explanation of "all my children will be here" and "yes, it will be a big order", it was a no go. I called my one friend with young children "Do you have a photographer you recommend ?". I called her recommendation. The recommendation informed me she was moving to San Diego. "Do you have a photographer you recommend?" I called that photographer to be told she was booked for Memorial Day. "Do you have a photographer you recommend?" I contact that photographer. I like the photography on her web site. She is available. We e-mail back and forth, back and forth. We decide late afternoon in Green park,downtown Charlotte. We discuss clothing options. I am excited. I am elated. My "Hallmark moment" is coming true. I send all the information to my family. The youngest son says," I am taking my Stats exam Memorial Day. I can't hang around until 5:30 Saturday". In his defense there was a tornado in Tuscaloosa. Then the husband comes home waving my e-mail in his little hand. His response is " I thought I would wear a suit and tie when you and I have our picture made." This in response to the photographer's input that dark denim makes a nice picture. Now we are scheduled at 8:00 am Saturday morning because of the natural lighting. Instead of the cool park it will be here at home. Because I know there is no way in hell we will arrive at a park at 8:00 am as a family looking half way decent for a picture. My last e-mail to the family is be downstairs at 8:00am that Saturday. I don't care what you wear as long as you are awake, bathed, and with a smile. I have had no response from the male family members. The daughter has sent a picture of a dress "Betty Draper" style with "Madonna" breast cups. The photographer suggested maybe everyone throwing a football around for a good picture. Hello! Did you not get the e-mail that the husband is wearing a suit and tie ? The Hallmark moment is over. Hurry up and take the damn picture!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!