Lil Wayne

Last night was one of tossing and turning, punching the pillow and no sleep. I am so worried about Lil Wayne. He is on Rikers Island serving a one year sentence for having a semiautomatic pistol on his tour bus in 2007. After all these years of watching all the Law and Orders we know about Rikers Island. Threatening the criminals with Rikers always gets them to confess on the show. So you see my concern. But Lil Wayne plea bargained a 12 month sentence and went peacefully saying it was God's will. He said he avoided getting tips on prison life. He didn't say where he would have gotten those tips - the internet or his home boys. Lil Wayne ended by saying "This is Lil Wayne going to jail. Nobody I can talk to can tell me what that's like. I just say I'm looking forward to it." Don't you love someone who has enough confidence to refer to themselves in the third person. There is no fear of him coming out with prison tats. I don't think there is any space available on his body. I don't think he can keep his metal stud in his lip. I would think that would be a weapon. And what about all the grills on his teeth? He could chomp down on another inmate and do some serious damage, kinda of like a pit bull bite. He has been Twittering like crazy so I guess he got to keep his cell phone. I now have to fit into my schedule his twitter. That should make me sleep better. Lil Wayne recorded a ton before going in. That way we won't know he is gone. That is good because he can't sing without all that electronic stuff. Plus singing in the shower in prison might not be so good especially when you lean over to get the soap. There are polls to vote for who will have the best career prison comeback. Evidently T.I.'s career is awesome. I guess I will get me a candle, make it some grill out of aluminum foil and light it every night until Lil Wayne is safe at home with an even bigger career.

Yesterday

This weekend was Baskets of Yarn's annual knitting retreat. Instead of being in Boone, N.C. it was held at the shop. All went well. I enjoyed seeing all the old friends and making new ones. Although I was not very involved with the preparation this year I worked both days. Needless to say I was dead yesterday. I slept until 10:00 and went straight to the couch. I only got up to pee, walk the dogs and feed myself and the dogs. I ate a muffin, approximately half of a pound of linguine with clam sauce, and half of an apple pie. I went back to bed at 8:00 p.m. With all my carbo loading I was able to go to the dog park today. Of course I wore my "body enhancing underwear" and spandex yoga pants to allow for all the food I ate at the retreat and yesterday.

Jeff Bridges

I have not seen the movie Jeff Bridges won for the Oscars. Several people on Facebook have said it was good. I am just happy he won. He stood on the red carpet with his wife of 33 years beaming and holding her hand. That says more than words about him.I have always enjoyed seeing his movies so I better see this one. He looked nice in his tux too.

The Oscars

Just finished watching the Oscars. They aren't over but they just got too boring to watch any longer. I do have some opinions to post. Is Kathy Ireland pregnant or is just copying my bloated belly and IBS? Who did Sarah Jessica Parker's spray tan? She looked liked me at 16 with a bottle of QT. I loved Sandra Bullock's dress. She looked like an Oscar winner. Helen Mirren and Meryl Streep showed me that aging gracefully is beautiful. Zac Efron copied my hair style when I wake up in the morning. George, oh George, you need a haircut. You did not look your best for the Oscars. Even a gorgeous Italian eye candy could not make the hair look better. I know you are pining for me. I am your epitome of the perfect women but alas I remain married. I don't plan to knock off the husband any time soon George so get a haircut. Well I will read the results in the AM of the last few winners I missed. I am thinking of switching to Tom Sellack as my next husband after this one dies. His hair always looks good.

The Elephant in the Room

There is an elephant in the room and I can't ignore it anymore. I want to see a female as President before I die. When my daughter was born the first thing I said was "She will be the second female President after Elizabeth Dole". We all know Elizabeth crashed and burned after becoming N.C. Senator. I didn't support Hillary. I feel she is all for what will get Hillary ahead. Now here comes Sarah Palin. People swarm to hear her message. But if you follow her ascent that is no substance, kinda like those decaff,low fat, artificially sweetened lattes women drink. She hasn't ever completed anything she started but her marriage. So I have come to realize I just have to suck it up and vote for any woman when they run and hope for the best. I mean look at all the male politicians and all their screw-ups. New York and South Carolina voted for incompetent Governors and Lt. Governors. And John Edwards helped take the heat off women candidates. A hundred dollar haircut for him keeps the scrutiny off any woman candidate's haircut.

BUZZ

I try to keep current with all the stuff happening. I will not twitter. Facebook has been good to connect with people but I refuse to play the games. I text it just takes me awhile.I now prefer to e-mail than try to track someone down on the phone. I can even remember being insulted that someone had the gall to use an answering machine in their home. Who did they think they were? Today I finally checked out that BUZZ thing. It says I have 16 followers. That is more than this blog. Remember how I wanted to be blog of note? I have given up on that. But what the hell is BUZZ?

Jerry Springer

I admit when I channel surf I do watch snippets of Jerry Springer. I have wondered where they get the people who appear on the show and why. There never seems to be any resolution made between the people. Just lots of fighting and hair pulling, mainly by the women. What brings me to the show is I actually know someone who appeared on the show. Well I don't actually know him. But I did read about him in the paper. Seems a man in the local area went on the show with his girlfriend and the stripper he cheated on his girlfriend with. The show was pretty exciting with the man and his girlfriend duking it out while the stripper did a mean pole dance. I hate I missed the show. But the icing on the cake so to speak for the man was his parole officer was watching the show. I guess being on Jerry Springer is a parole violation plus crossing state lines doesn't help. So now the man sits in jail. Where I don't know. A few days after the article appeared, a letter to the editor asked what was the probation officer doing watching Jerry Springer during his work time. My immediate thought was he was catching a parole violator. But after further thought not all of the contestants come from this area. I will ponder further on this and maybe blog more later.